A Night To Remember - Living Positive Victoria

News

Quick Exit

A Night To Remember

Last Sunday, 18 May at the Positive Living Centre, as the sun glistened through translucent panels displaying the names of those we have lost to HIV and AIDS, 140 folk (including our livestream audience) came together from across the positive community, alongside family, friends, allies, clinical and social researchers and government, to mark the 40th International AIDS Candlelight Memorial and reflect on this year’s theme: “Don’t Forget to Remember.”

The evening opened with a moving performance by the LOW REZ Melbourne Male Choir, whose acoustic rendition of It’s So Hard to Say Goodbye to Yesterday by Boyz II Men resonated through the vaulted ceilings, setting a reverent tone for the night.

 

Pictured: The LOW REZ Melbourne Male Choir, Credit: Matto Lucas

 

Guests were then welcomed by MC Dean Arcuri, who gave an opening address, reminding us all of the grassroots beginnings of the vigil, starting in 1985 with just two men, Tom Carter and the late Phil Carswell, lighting candles under an umbrella in what is now Federation Square, sparking a tradition that we honour four decades later.

Dean also shared the words of Victorian Commissioner for LGBTQIA+ Communities, Joe Ball, who was unable to make it on the night. He spoke of the beginning of the AIDS epidemic, saying:

“There was no funding, no public health response, only stigma, silence and death. Eventually in Australia, governments did listen. But that was because activists, community leaders, people living with HIV and allies stood up and refused to be ignored. Because they knew, as we know still today, that silence equals death.”

 

Pictured: Dean Arcuri, Credit: Matto Lucas

 

Beau Newham led a community panel with Deborah Akumu, Brenton Geyer, and Michelle Grimshaw about what has kept this special occasion so strong for forty years. Brenton, who was recruited to the Candlelight Vigil Committee (as it was known), fondly recalled the meetings in the backrooms of the since-closed gay pub, The Xchange Hotel. He said:

“The nature of the event has shifted in time, from many thousands of people meeting in a very public way to the room we’re in today. Just because the event has got smaller doesn’t mean it’s less important.”

Michelle added:

“History keeps us connecting,” and that now, “the candles are more about holding hope, [whereas] back in the day they were more to do with mourning.”

Asked about the future of the memorial and getting these stories out to newer generations, Brenton spoke of the power of harnessing artistic processes to engage people, with Deborah going on to say:

“Meaningful involvement with young people in the HIV response is something that we really need to work on.”

 

Pictured: (L-R) Beau Newham, Deborah Akumu, Michelle Grimshaw and Brenton Geyer, Credit: Matto Lucas

 

Another Vigil Committee veteran and member of LPV’s Positive Speakers Bureau (PSB), Tex McKenzie, then gave his own keynote reflection, talking about the growth of the event from those two men in 1985 to a remarkable 20,000-plus strong crowd in 1994. He recounted a beautiful anecdote of that night:

“Our lookout person at the Exhibition Building called out for everyone to ‘come and see,’ and viewing from the huge side doors of the Royal Exhibition Building, we looked out into the Carlton Gardens, and I’ll never forget it—we saw a river of light, flowing towards us.”

During the earlier days of the vigil, people would listen to the names of those lost to HIV/AIDS, until the peak of the pandemic, when he said:

“It became just too many to read out.”

A sobering reminder of the devastation the virus caused before modern treatments.

He finished with a quote from American author Dan Savage:

“During the darkest days of the AIDS crisis, we buried our friends in the morning, we protested in the afternoon and we danced all night. The dance kept us in the fight because it was the dance we were fighting for. It didn’t look like we were going to win then, and we did. It doesn’t feel like we’re going to win now, but we could. Keep fighting, keep dancing and remember their names, remember the love.”

 

Pictured: Tex McKenzie, Credit: Matto Lucas

 

The second keynote speaker of the night and PSB member, Stephanie Raper, also spoke of dancing. Stephanie, who was born with HIV in 1991, said she had witnessed the community come together and grieve her whole life:

“Children with HIV released balloons, lit candles, some cried, but most heroic of all, laughed. It was my childhood best friend who shouted, ‘Why is nobody dancing?’ It made me wonder why we ever stopped. It was the next year I was grieving her. At her funeral, everyone pretended that she had cancer. I miss her dance moves, I miss her laugh, I miss my friend. As the world quickly forgot, HIV positive people are still here. Long-term survivors of HIV will never forget to remember.”

 

Pictured: Stephanie Raper, Credit: Matto Lucas

 

CEO of Living Positive Victoria, Richard Keane gave closing remarks on the importance of activism and advocacy:

“These memorials were and remain a show of resistance to the narratives of shame and secrecy.” They are about “having our identities as people living with HIV respected.”

 

Pictured: (left) LPV President, Craig Brennan, (right) LPV CEO, Richard Keane, Credit: Matto Lucas

 

It was then time to light the candles and reflect in silence about the significance of this event and remember all those we have lost, many of whom had friends and family with us in the crowd. This is always such a special and important part of the night in the hearts of attendees, and the added gravitas of the fortieth year was felt by all as we collectively chose to remember, and not forget.

 

Pictured: audience observing silent reflection with lit candles, Credit: Matto Lucas

 

Living Positive Victoria would like to thank all of those who made the 40th International AIDS Candlelight Memorial a success:

If you have any feedback for us about the memorial, we’d love to hear it. Please email us at info@lpv.org.au, using the subject line ‘Candlelight Feedback’.

If you’re interested in joining our Positive Speakers Bureau, please click here.

If you missed the memorial, you can catch up by watching our live stream below.